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Wednesday, December 8th, 2004
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College is an experience like no other. The only time when you look ahead and know what has to be comming. Real life. Being half way through is an interesting time as well. Meeting new people. Falling in love. Realizing that somethings will never be the same. It is also a time when people change. Time changes everything, and everything is a a strange new world that still has to be discovered. It is very odd to know what has to be next, but not know what that next thing is.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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I read this joke and I am torn. Yes, I do rollerblade, but it is roller hockey. So, does the hockey part make it ok or not? I know I am not gay, but I do rollerblade in my choice sport. Someone please help clarify this for me.
What's the hardest part about rollerblading?
Telling your parents you're gay.
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Comments: Read 7 or Add Your Own.
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(Chorus)
I want you to see,
what I want there to be
a relationship between us,
that I know will never be.
I want to hold you close,
and to make sure you know,
of feelings that I keep inside and
That I want to swim deep within your soul.
(Verse)
sitting in the corner
of a crowded room
I look up from my guitar
only to see you.
Your not paying attention
you don’t know I exist
you can’t know how I feel inside
but at times I feel like this.
(Chorus)
you slowly walk towards me
and in passing you say hi.
An emotion stirs inside of me
and now I feel I can fly.
But nothing will compare
to the feelings I would have
if I could sit right down next to you
it would make me feel so glad, cuz.
(Chorus)
(Chorus)
I just want you to know
that no matter what happens
I’ll always want to
swim deep within your soul.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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A is for - Age: 19
B is for - Boyfriend/Girlfriend: nope
C is for - Career in Future: not sure
D is for - Dead person you would like to meet: Jimi Hendrix
E is for - Essential item: wallet
F is for - Favorite song at the moment: Piano man - Billy Joel
G is for - Guy/Girls you've kissed: some people
I is for - Instruments you play: Guitar, drums, bass, and alittle keyboards
J is for - Job title: Student
L is for - Living places: parents house... blah. lol
M is for - Memory of the day: not sure
N is for - Number of people you've slept with: 2
O is for - Overnight hospital stays: 0
P is for - Phobias: spiders, snakes, anything creepy or crawly
Q is for - Quote you like: It's funny to me.....makes me go squish.
R is for - Relationship that lasted the longest: 5 months
S is for - Sexuality: Heterosexual
T is for - Time you wake up everyday: either 7 or 9
U is for - Unique trait(S): I can twist my wrist all the way around
V is for - Vegetable you love: carrots
W is for - Worst habit: over-analyzation
X is for - X-rays you've had: my wrist, my teeth, and my finger.
Y is for - Yummy food you make: easy-mac and regular mac
Z is for - Zodiac sign: Libra
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, April 15th, 2004
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Saturday, April 10th, 2004
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| Time: | 11:57 pm. |
| Mood: |  sad. |
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It's hard to say happy easter with tears in your eyes.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, April 8th, 2004
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interesting day....nothing too special had jimmy johns with Laura and Robyn. Cut grandma's grass and had class. It was a surprisingly normal day today. hmmmmmm. Learned a new song. Great song. Well learned two songs. Both very good. Empty Apartment by Yellowcard and Breathing by Yellowcard. This is the next song to learn. Only One by Yellowcard. Great band everyone should check them out.
Only One by Yellowcard
Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason
I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one
Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone
And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only my only one
Here I go so dishonestly
Leave a note for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
So let me go and you will find someone
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one
My only one
My only one
My only one
You are my only, my only one
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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I just want to let everyone know I am fine. Just had to get out some pent up frustrations. I am perfectly ok.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Saturday, April 3rd, 2004
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If I died tomorrow would you realize I'm gone.
would you sit around and remember,
me playing my songs.
Would you wish you could see me just one last time.
would you wish in your heart that you would have said that one last good-bye.
Is there something to tell me that you think can wait.
Do you put it off until another date.
Do you just expect to see me again?
Well maybe you do, and maybe when,
we spend those few hours together you'll see,
that I am all that I'm cracked up to be.
But maybe you won't and maybe you won't care,
when I don't show up or meet you where
we decided to meet to hang out and talk,
and you'll get frustrated and just start to walk.
But eventually you'll realize that I am no more,
and that I won't, at any momment, walk through the door,
and say hey how ya doing? or what's goin on?
because I will have played my last good-bye song.
To the world who doesn't know me,
and a society that doesn't care.
To some person who never met me,
but I was supposed to be there
one true love and I guess now they lose,
but hopefully they won't start drinking the booze.
Because I'm not that important, to anyone I'll swear,
that three weeks after I am gone, not to many people will care.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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I hate struggles.
I hate feelings.
I hate beauty.
I hate passion.
I hate that stupid feeling you get in your stomach when someone you likes walks by or calls.
I hate the dumb grin I get when someone I like calls.
I hate alot.
But most of all, I hate being single.
I hate being alone.
I hate knowing I have feelings.
I hate not being the asshole.
I hate always doing "What is right".
I hate that nice guys finish last.
I hate formals and balls and pictures and requests.
I hate the demands I put on my self.
I hate my goals, what they are.
I hate the times that I have to realize what I have lost.
I hate realizing what I have missed.
I hate realizing what I could miss.
I hate realizing Dan's right.
I hate being in someone's pocket.
I hate that I am alone and I hate that all I want is not there.
I hate wanting everything I can't have.
I hate all of this.
I hate it all.....and it all hates me.
Sorry, just alittle stressed. None of this is about any one person. That I swear. I'm tired. Goodnight.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, April 1st, 2004
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| Time: | 11:43 pm. |
| Mood: |  confused. |
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I..........AM..........SO..................................CONFUSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
now I feel alittle better.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, March 31st, 2004
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There is so much I wish I knew
about the difference between me and you.
There is so much I want to know
about all my feelings that come and go.
I wish I knew how I felt
instead of being at a loss for words
I feel like I have been dealt
a hand of emotions for which I have no verbs.
I wonder how you feel inside
as I sit alone in the night.
Sometimes I sit alone and cry
and wish I did not have to fight,
The feelings that I have inside
because I know I care for you
and that I want you by my side
so I can have a better view
of what life would be like
to have you and hold you
so close to me
to feel you wrapped tightly
deep in my embrace.
I want to know what it is like
to kiss you oh so softly
and hug your every curve
I want to know what it is like
to listen to your problems
so you can tell how you hurt.
I want to be the reason
the will and the way.
I want you to be my reason,
to wake up everyday.
I wish you knew who you were
and sometimes I do too.
But, mostly I wish you were here
cuz then I would know what to do.
I have so many feelings
deep in my soul.
I just wish I could tell you
what only God and I know.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Verse
Time is my enemy
in the battle for my life
time is my enemy
as I am waiting my turn to die.
Time is my enemy
as I sit and look at you
Time is my enemy
and it is distorting my view
Of the beauty I once knew of
and the life I shared with you
of the love we had together
and the pain you put me through.
Chorus
Cuz I want a girl to love me
and I want a girl to show
all the feelings that I keep inside
Cuz I just want her to know
That she makes me feel special
and she makes melt inside
and I will love her every second
that time goes flying by.
Verse 2
Cuz I can’t stand to see you
in the arms of another guy
and I’m struggling to get through
this life that’s passing me by.
And I wonder what it would be like
to have someone who cares
To hold in close to me
as my eyes look into theirs
to love and to cherish
for as long as we both shall live
to hold and give kisses
and to always know
that she’ll be by my side
and I never have to let go
she’s a perfect fit inside me
and now I want to show
Chorus
Cuz I want a girl to love me
and I want a girl to show
all the feelings that I keep inside
Cuz I just want her to know
That she makes me feel special
and she makes melt inside
and I will love her every second
that time goes flying by.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Well there is a confidence booster for ya. Bad day. great weekend, but a bad day today.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Yeah great weekend. tons of fun. Anna is awesome. Coolest girl I know.
Why do I hate this feeling, yet I love it too? hmmmmm......makes me think.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, March 17th, 2004
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Much Confusion is life right now.......hmmmmmmmm........yeah. Good sort of and bad sort of. yeah.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, August 30th, 2003
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Much pensiveness. Many mixed emotions. Feel good, feel shitty, surprisingly in a small way feel in love. Long story. not really interested in sharing unless I do so on my own. goodnight.
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, August 20th, 2003
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| Subject: | hi |
| Time: | 10:19 pm. |
| Mood: | happy tired and blah. |
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Well alot has gone on lately. A lot of good stuff has happened lately. I won't give details, because that is my business. If you need to know you already know. I had something in mind for this entry but now I can't remember what it was. so I am going to bed. goodnight.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Friday, August 15th, 2003
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Big things come in small packages.
A heart comes in the human body.
A small organ controlling all of life, wrapped in a giant box persay.
A punch. A big hurt in a small swing of the arm.
But the most important of all,
Love.
Such a small word that carries so much meaning.
Four letters to describe a life time of emotion.
Four letters to describe something completely undescribable.
Four words that when used incorrectly can cause pain that is only felt in some situations.
Four letters that can make you cry, smile, laugh, and even kill.
Big things come in small packages, always check the label before you open it.
Just a lot on my head tonight. good evening.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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dadivinethinker's journal
pensive.
okay.
depressed.
blah.